“Being apart teaches us how to be together”
Distance is one of the most challenging obstacles a couple can encounter. Being apart with someone you love is never easy. There would be times where you’d feel incomplete like a part of you is missing. Some days it’s great, most days it would make you want to give up everything just to feel the warmth of their hands or to witness the expansion of their iris as the light finds its way into their eyes. I have been in the same scenario. It was heartbreaking but I slowly learned how to get through it and it was worth it!
Here are some techniques that would help you survive a long distance relationship:
1. Be rational and don’t give in to overthinking
Being in a long distance relationship will make you question your partner’s love for you A LOT, there will be times that they become too busy to reply, forget to update you from time to time— and some of this things will create uncertainty in your mind. “is he still into me?” or “did he find someone else?” but I tell you, DO NOT GIVE IN to overthinking. People commit these natural mistakes, no one will ever be too consistent, it’s okay to sometimes spend a little more time with yourself. Remove uncertainty by putting more trust in your partner. Always think rationally and don’t let your emotions drive you crazy.
2. Develop emotional intimacy
Long-distance relationships involve a lot of talking. After all, what else can you do on skype videos and messaging apps, right? Therefore, you must develop emotional intimacy! Share your personal feelings, hopes, and dreams. Giving affirmation helps big time too. These things will bring you closer together. This means growing despite the distance! You’ll know each other better and you’ll feel completely safe telling your thoughts and feelings even the uncomfortable ones.
3. Don’t consider every fight as a potential end to your relationship
Fights are common too with people who are far from each other. Jealousy and uncertainties will always try to deflect you from your partner. Most of the time it will get you into thinking if your relationship is still worth saving. Every fight might feel like the end but it’s not! do not think of it that way, if you do, it will only lead to a real break up. Think of the problems as a challenge that you have to overcome. After all, a fight is made so that one team shall win; aren’t you two a team?
4. Have a vision
Having a vision means having something to look forward to. Longing is a very hard struggle for every long-distance couple. You must keep your hope of seeing each other regardless of the time being. It will give you the feeling of excitement and it will help you appreciate the moments that you, two, spend together.
5. Assure your partner
One of the most important rules that you have to be consistent about in a long-distance relationship is the habit of assuring your partner about your relationship. It’s normal for people to overthink and doubt especially when you don’t see each other every day. It’s not enough for one person to just breathe in all the fears that go through his mind. It’s important to your help your partner get through their fears by assuring them that you’ll stay and love him despite the distance. Assurance isn’t just words, it’s the actions too. Being consistent and showing how much you love them by extending simple efforts even through the internet.
Being in a long-distance relationship is never going to be easy. Expect a lot of hurdles along the way. But even so, both of you should work hard to survive every obstacle— and you have to do it EVERYDAY. Remind yourself, the reason why you got together in the first place.